I simply have the GREATEST support system in the form of people around me.
Mi Familia. Although they have no idea what the hell is going on with me now, they know well enough not to ask. I need my space to breathe and they give it freely. No questions asked when tears are falling while in the car on our way to work. No prodding over dinner when I'm unusually quiet and rushing thru my meal. They let me be. And I love it.
Special mention of my Achi. Hay, Ach... Your shobe's crazy, you know that right? But thank you for taking in my tears, even when they were unclear. It's a messed up story, I'm telling you. I'll tell you completely one day, when I'm ready to share my shame. I know you won't judge me, but I've been judging myself from Day One and it's hard for me to get into the nasty details... especially with family. I love you. To my core.
My office mates. OH WOW! Hahaha! They saw firsthand the horror I can become with a messed up heart. It's U-G-L-Y! Trins, Aids, I'm sorry for shutting you out and thank you for welcoming me back with open arms when I was ready to talk (which was today!). Masas and Fully Booked for lunch was an excellent idea. Badette, it's amazing how you sensed I was broken, and that was over YM! Thank you for being "affected." Of course I know I have a friend in you. Always and forever! Madam, IKAW NA! Witness to banyo-breakdown #2! Haha! Fine, fine, you may take what I've said in the past against me. But I know better now. Badeth, you gave me words of wisdom from the start. I knew you'd get where I was coming from, given your own life with (Sir) Tatti. Lisa, I owe you kwento. We must do lunch again before we make the move to Marajo. Sbarro ulet? TV5 is family because of you guys, and more. And I hate that our family isn't complete. Let's TALI!!!
Friends overseas, you ROCK my cyberspace! Yaya, despite being all the way in Irishland, you hold me together. I'll give a full blow-by-blow account on TMYG because typing it all out on YM will tire me out. But you know the gist of it, and you are one of the reasons why I'm fine today. Tala, I ruined our last lunch. But I'm glad you heard my story out. You and Pau were there the night I was explaining myself to the group. Favorite line: "I can play, too!" O-M-G! Apparently, I can't! Good to know now, though. Hug your asawa for me when you get to Sri Lanka.
My boys, how can you live without them. Secret Keeper, *sigh* just when we thought we were getting somewhere, eh? Oh well, you live, you learn. You're overprotective but I love you for it. G-tired, you and your fixin' a broken heart song. SHATTAP! Haha! I'm hanging on, luv. And from the looks of today, I'm hanging on real good. James, feeling close?!?! We're already close. Korakcha ka na! I have a question, did Oplan Wonderland push thru or shall I conspire for something else with you? I'm a PM away, my boy. Bok-bok-bok.
My korakchas. My heart & soul. They give me strength, passion, love and cheer. They hold my world together in the darkest of times and keep me sane by listening to my crazy obscenities. Chaw, bestest friend in the world. You know me, inside out. Thank you for holding on to me on night one. You are a true pillar of strength. Rowena, LA-GU-NA!!! Haha! Things we come up with when we're together. You got me out of my stupor! Thank you for stress eating and sharing your Aiden-afternoon with me. Palawan Budz, why didn't you get the code words!?!? Pick-up-the-pieces, ang your comeback was Elrond and taboo?!? Stress-Oreña-Drillon! Haha! But you are amazing. I knew you had my back from the start, it's one of the reasons why I so bravely took this on. Beej, last again on the memo, but I love your facebook hug. You'll know everything soon enough.
Today was a good day because of ALL of you. I'm overwhelmed by the love and life that surround me when I'm among you. I love you, really. I'm getting over this hurdle, seemingly a lot easier than I initially thought, because of you.
Finally, I can close this chapter. It's been a long time coming, and I'm glad you saw me through the ride and now seeing me through the rough waters. Thanks is not enough, but it's all I've got. THANK YOU. Truly. From the bottom of my healing heart. :)